Patient Stories
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There are many stereotypes and misconceptions about the care Dr. Tiller provided. The later abortion care he offered was for women who had very poor fetal prognosis, babies with anomalies. Saying these babies were viable is misleading. Most of the later procedures were done for babies with illnesses that were not conducive to life. The few infants that would have survived delivery would have had drastically shortened lives filled with numerous surgeries and endless suffering. The week I had my procedure there was a woman whose baby had its internal organs developed outside of its body. Another woman’s baby had no brain. There was never any hope for those babies—there was no miracle that would have saved them.
I was forced to make an agonizing choice for a baby my husband and I wanted and loved very much. This was NOT a form of birth control. I chose the lesser of the evils and did what any loving parent should—eased the suffering of an innocent baby. Forcing my baby to live would have been cruel. That was a deeply personal decision and one I will gladly sort out with my maker in the hereafter. I would gladly offer my soul to protect my child.
I do not take pride in what I was forced to do but I carry no shame. In a perfect world my baby would have come home to a family that wanted them very much. It was not a situation I took lightly. I will also mourn this loss the remainder of my life.
Dr. Tiller was the only doctor who accepted my particular case due to my own physical complications. Dr. Tiller is my hero, he not only saved my life but saved my family. I was fully prepared to end my own life to protect my baby from a life of misery. Dr. Tiller offered a service that although much despised is also critical in a civilized society.
The man who shot him is a coward. He ran away like a thief in the night, too afraid to stand tall for his principles. Dr. Tiller was a man who stood up for what he believed in without fear. I will never forget him or the profound impact he had on me and my family for the rest of our lives.
I am so sorry this tragety has taken place. No one knows more than a person who's been through tan unwanted pregnancy in their lives what a terrible loss this is. I was pregnant in a time prior to abortions being legalized. The shame and humiliation at that time was unbearable. I learned of a doctor in Mexico that would perform an abortion. Many girls ranging from 16 to 29 were rounded up from motels in the middle of the night to proceed to this Doctor in Mexico. The vehicles had to turn their headlights out and proceed up a dirt road for approx one mile. The procedure took place in a boarded up old house. There was a man with a shotgun circling the house and directing us on where to go in. Inside was a small kitchen with another man sitting drinking coffee and also had a shotgun. After we were all in the house, they locked and bolted the door, no one was allowed to leave until all procedures were completed. I was the last of 13 women. The Dr and the nurse spoke very little english, so they would come down the stairs and look around, then point at whomever they chose to be next. I developed a severe infection after returning home and miscarrying (at a later term). I am now 58 years old, and childless I'm sure because of this infection I developed and was afraid to go to a Dr in the US. Women were being put in jail at that time. It's easy to say "I would NEVER", until you are in a situation that forces you to see another view.
We have come a long way from shotgun guards in Mexico for a women's lawful right to choose for herself. But hate always seeks another direction. Truly the death of this man is both tragic and a reminder for us to honor him and stay or become involved.
I know law enforcement CAN walk and chew gum at the same time. It appears though, that while focusing on international terrorism at the local levels - we've forgotten the law and overlooked many times the many reports regarding the national terrorist killer.
I hope the Justice Dept & Homeland Security (and with all the money now funneled their way) will accept some accountibility on this issue. While many may not accept or understand the service to women Dr. Tiller stood for, he was appreciated in every woman's individual case, and should have been better protected.
On behalf of all pro-choice people in the country, I have to say, the death of Dr. Tiller is going to encourage me to be more involved. Almost, five years to the day, I visited Dr. Tiller, my husband and I found out at 20 weeks that our baby had not only a heart defect, which would not allow him to breath, but also a clefting syndrome that prevented the baby's face from developing and they were not sure about him having eye lenses. We were devastated as we already had two healthy children. Upon a 3d ultrasound, we had no other alternative but to save this baby from a life of pain. We flew to Kansas from Pennsylvania and we met the "family" of Dr. George Tiller. He saved our family from a lifetime of agony, hurtful days and we were able to put our baby to rest. This was our choice and we were treated with such respect and dignity while visiting Dr. Tiller and his staff. I will do everything in my power to fight for abortion rights and long live Dr. Tiller's memory.
I had a "late term abortion" in 2000, when my baby was diagnosed with a multitude of problems....One of the things I am most thankful for is that when we made this horrible, heartbreaking decision, my husband and I went to our local hospital in Victoria, accompanied by our midwife and were given the most respectful, compassionate care imaginable by very professional people. My heart always goes out to the poor women who have to face hatred and ignorance along with the unthinkable.
Thank you,
Angela
BC, Canada
If Ashton Kusher and Larry King can get one million "tweets" over the course of several days, why aren't the messages of the 10s of millions of women who have had abortions and how their lives were affected being broadcast, especially in light of the recent, tragic killing of yet another brave abortion provider!
When I was in college, I remember reading a statistic that one in three women in college would receive an abortion. I was stunned. However, four years later, two out of our apartment of six girls had in fact received abortions - including myself. This was something we spoke about amongst ourselves but not to other friends, and in many cases not to our parents. We were embarrassed. We were responsible, intelligent, women who had become pregnant. Even today there are only a handful of people who are aware that I even had an abortion.
Fifteen years after graduating from college and after having my abortion, my husband and I started our family. We have experienced great joy with our two children - a son and a daughter. One of my biggest concerns is that my daughter will not have the ability to make choices about her body when she gets to be an adult.
I have often times regretted engaging in unprotected sexual activity which led to my getting pregnant in college. I have NEVER, not once, regretted having my abortion. By having an abortion in 1985, I did choose life - my life. I feel that I also, in the long run, chose the life of my two children that I have today.
Please, please start a media "blitz" and make people aware of how many women have been affected positively by Roe v. Wade. There is so much misinformation out there about what abortion is/means. Perhaps if more people realized that within their circle of friends, family, neighbors, classmates, colleagues, one third of the women have had abortions and many have been saved by them.
I never knew the doctor's name that performed my abortion; I was referred by another physician. All I knew, at age 39, single, just having been raped by a former boyfriend, that I couldn't have that child. I had a career but little money. Oliver was a red-headed, freckled-face African American and every time I thought of bringing his child to term I cried, vomited and recalled every minute of the horrible rape that resulted in my first pregnancy.
I'd never thought of pro choice or pro life alternatives before this horrific life-changing event. I'd always been careful. First, in 1966, with my first marriage, I took the pill. Then, with my second husband, I used a diaphragm. I was very careful in every relationship. I never wanted to be driven to make such a decision.
But when confronted, the choice was clear. What kind of mother would I have been, looking at a little red-headed, freckled-face child whom I knew was the result of a rape? Although I've never been violent, I felt indefinable rage and the ability to commit violence on Oliver and, yes, his offspring. I'm not proud of the way I felt, I labored long and hard over my decision. I am, and always have been, a Christian, but I am certain that God forgave me for aborting Oliver's child.
The year was 1984. Two years later, remarried, I gave birth, at age 41 to my only child, a son. He is my only child, my beloved son, Andrew, is now age 23.
Following Dr. Tiller's tragic murder and your director's appearance on "The Rachel Maddow Show" I think it's time for all of us who have painfully but thoughtfully sought an abortion to speak up, if not shout our experiences to everyone who will listen.
10 years ago I found myself pregnant and unmarried. My boyfriend left as soon as he found out. I made the choice to continue the pregnancy and have never regretted that decision. I understand the turmoil that women feel when they find themselves pregnant and alone. The best thing we can do is create support for women in these situations. It is extremely rare to "talk someone out of an abortion", which is what I find pro life organizations encourage. The most compassionate approach is to listen, truly listen to what the woman in crisis is saying, with her words and actions and to gently guide her in repeating what we hear her saying so that she can truly make her own choice.
This life alterning decision, regardless of which choice you make is too critical for another person to push there agenda, regardless of that that agenda, and pressure a woman to make a decision she is not comfortable with. Most of the people that are prochoice, believe that. When I was pregnant, the most critical conversation I had was with a staff member at Dr Tiller's office who referred me to a social worker. So often we hear about workers who are there to schedule the appointments, but there I found caring individuals who helped me make one of the most difficult decisions I have ever had to make. Thank you.
I myself have never had an abortion, but if I were to ever need one I would be relieived to know I can. Dr. Tiller was a great man for helping out lots of women in need. How anyone can kill for something like that...I'll never understand.
This is message for Dr Tiller, a great and caring American and physician.
He saved my daughters life by being there to terminate a pregnancy due to rape. My daughter did not tell anyone until she was 26 weeks. She is an athlete and we suspected, but since she didn't really "show" because of her being is such good shape it was too late to do anything. That's when we contacted Dr Tiller's clinic and we drove the 350 miles for consultation. His compassion, caring, and understanding helped us all in a very difficult decision. This was in 2000. Since then she has done very well. Dr Tiller literally saved our daughter's life. He will be missed by all and until there is true justice in the world people like him who put their life on the line for others will always be in the extreme minority. I have always found it ironic that those that so oppose people like Dr Tiller and what they do for others are the first ones to want to go to war and kill those that disagree with them.
I will always support a woman's choice.
Respectfully,
Tom
I have had two abortions. One when I was 17 and a senior in High School. I had what I thought was protected sex (condom), and my birth control failed. I was addicted to drugs at the time, and was for many years after. I knew I was unable to care for a child and just wanted to finish high school.
My parents were going through a divorce at the time and were seemingly unavailable to support me. Luckily for me I didn't need parental consent in my state... I don't know what I would have done then.
I was treated at a local clinic for $200... Luckily it was a low enough amount of money that I was able to borrow it from friends and my boyfriend.
It was en emotionally painful experience but I was grateful to be treated with care by that staff. Prior to the procedure the staff counseled me on my other options. The procedure was painless, safe, and fast.
Four years later I became pregnant during a long term abusive relationship... also related to a failed condom. This time the experience was quite different for me. For one... I knew that a pregnancy would forever tie me to this man who abused me... if I kept the baby or not. I was unwilling to hold that attachment. Two, I was no longer living at home. I did not want to be on welfare. My family was unable to support me. Luckily I had medical insurance that covered the procedure this time, as my funds were more limited.
I was able to receive a safe and painless procedure. But on the way into the clinic I was forced to listen to protesters yelling at me and view their hateful, violent signs.
The wait at this clinic was very long, and my insurance didn't cover anything but local anesthesia, so I was awake during the procedure which was unpleasant. Still, the staff was caring and thoughtful... although they seemed overworked and stressed.
Today I am drug free, and I have a son. I am in a happy, healthy marriage with a loving man who understands my past decisions.
I thought about these "what COULD have been's" a lot while I was pregnant with my son. Caring a WANTED pregnancy also made me realize how much of a commitment a pregnancy itself can be. I can't imagine a woman who doesn't want her baby being forced to endure a pregnancy. The heartburn, the pelvic pain, the weight gain, the back pain, the nausea, the breathing difficulties... for me it was a lot to endure and I wanted this baby!
As selfish as some may see my decisions, I am not regretful. I know that the choices I made were difficult, and I know that I will always wonder what could have been. I know this is normal.
Today I use my voice to stand up for choice. I want to make sure that women of future generations will always live in a country where abortion is a safe procedure for women AND medical staff.
I want abortions to be affordable and uncommon. I want to see young woman taught more about birth control options and to see BC available and accessible to women. I want abstinence only sex education to be stopped.
I want to make sure young women don't hurt themselves trying to abort their own babies. I don't want young girls to commit suicide because they are pregnant. I want parental consent laws removed in ALL STATES.
I want to make sure that a woman who goes into a clinic doesn't have to look at a poster of a dead baby. That she doesn't have to hear people yelling "murderer!" at her. I want to make sure she doesn't have to worry about violence.
I want to insure that doctors, health care workers and clinic staff don't have to work in fear. I don't want to see more clinics close.
The terrorist murder of Dr. Tiller has shaken me and my husband to our core. We have already donated funds to Planned Parenthood to protect our local clinics. We will do what we can within our means to help.
I am so sad and sacred for women's rights and those that serve us. I am a woman that had to make the hard choice at 15 years old. The decision for me was to let this fetus grow into a child I could not care for; I was a drug addict and drop out or delay this growth until I could really care for a child. It was 1973 the first year a women could make this choice. I was lucky the women and men that fought so hard to make this happen, I was able to chose my destiny. I am the woman and mother I am today, fully recovered, a social worker and good mother because I was able to delay having a child, as a child. I want to speak out and say I am not ashamed, I have no regrets, I am forever thankful that I was able to choose. When I had my abortion, there was no harassment, no bulletproof glass, and no angry, mean people calling me a killer. Today
when I take my young women to clinics we have to walk through hate and intimation. It makes me so sad and scared. And yet if you ask me I would die for this right. Dr Tiller is a hero, a man that said
Trust Women. We have loss so much and everyday we are losing more.
Thank you for all you do.
It is with deepest sympathy that I express my condolences to the family and friends of Dr. Tiller. I was introduced to Dr. Tiller in October of 2005 when I had found out that the baby that I was carrying would be born with congenital defects that no medicine or surgery could correct. It was a life changing experience that I will take with me to the end. He saved me, my family, and by unborn fetus a life of agony, anguish, and hardship. It was the most difficult decision I had to make. In addition to myself being at the clinic, there were other women there; not to abort a child that was healthy, but a fetus that was grossly deformed or sick. I would never wish the heartache I had to go through on an enemy but wish that they could catch a glimpse of what it feels like to have to make the decision that I made. There were thousands of letters of gratitude to Dr. Tiller posted throughout the clinic. Dr. Tiller was a professional, sincere, and caring physician that came highly recommended from renowned genetic doctors that I spent countless hours with trying to negotiate the results to painful testing that I endured only to find out the inevitable. There is no reason for a woman to continue a pregnancy that could endanger her life or the life of her unborn fetus. The world has evolved enough to know that women are entitled to make these choices on their own without the added burden of the world coming down on them. Instead of investing all the time it takes to protest, why not take the time to volunteer and counsel women that have had to go through the nightmare of losing a baby or take the time to volunteer and help the children that are abused or the vulnerable that cannot speak for themselves and have been taken advantage of by family members. Why not focus your negative energy on the selfless acts of "church-going" citizens that impregnate their 12 year old nieces or daughters. Choose the battle that is worth fighting, don't make the lives of people that have lived through this experience worse than what it was. I drove 60 straight hours from Toronto, Ontario, Canada to meet Dr. Tiller and don't regret any second of it. I sympathize deeply with the clients scheduled to meet with Dr. Tiller in the future, because he is the only one that was willing to help the people that nobody else would. Something that has stuck with me since meeting Dr. Tiller was that he said "pregnancy doesn't begin with a positive test, it begins with the first thought that you want to have a baby". It couldn't have been a more honest and sincere quote; we had been trying for some time to get pregnant, only to have to give the baby up. What about the staff at the clinic who have to worry about their own fate each day, what about their livelihoods? Are those protestors going to take in those families because they no longer have a job to go to? Pro-life? Isn't that what Dr. Tiller was doing? Grow up.
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